First Contact

Then He Turned
Photo by SB

Today was the first time I have met someone through this blog. I had the pleasure of having lunch with Stephen Haynes who writes the blog, Magic Flute Fine Arts Nudes.

We met in the quaint South Park neighborhood in SF at a little coffee shop/restaurant. We chatted about food, wine, his book, the law, traveling and many other subjects. Sadly, I had to get back to work. We finally started talking about art on the walk to my car. Maybe next time we can start on that and expand because that is what is a major part of both of your lives.

I hope he enjoyed the SF MOMA and the Adams/O'Keefe and Avedon shows.

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In other news, CalTrans is closing the Oakland Bay Bridge from tonight until early Tuesday morning. If you have not been to the Bay Area, the Bay Bridge is the most heavily used span of all of the eight bridges. It is the main bridge connecting the East Bay to SF. I cross it twice every day for work. Tomorrow, I am going to work from my home and then Saturday I am going to have to cross it catch a flight to London. It will be perfect for my wanderlust. I will write more about that whirl-wind trip later.

Photo Note: This is probably my favorite from my photos of Andrea. We watched an Avedon documentary in class last week. I practiced his technique for getting his subjects to slip into moods. He would not say, "Look sad." He would guide you to think about something heavy and dark, like your own mortality, by leading you through deeper questions while he quietly clicked away.

Andrea recently broke up with her boyfriend and we talked about how it went. I asked her to think about how she had watched him turn around and walk out of her life and for her to think about her first emotion at that moment. She was quiet for a couple of minutes. Andrea is a tough woman and this was the most emotional photo I took. After the entire photo shoot, she requested to see that one photo. She said it hurt to think of that moment, but she needed to start working through the end of that relationship and this was a small step.

I tried having her think of happy things, angry things, arousing things, and many other emotions. The best photos came from the happy and the break up guided moments.

I am curious on how other photographers and models have gotten into various mood for photo shoots. What worked for you?

The Pinnacle

Buzz Aldrin at Work- 40 Years Ago Today
Photo from NASA Archives

On NPR this morning I heard an interview with Buzz Aldrin, the second man to walk on the moon forty years ago today. What an insightful view of humanity. On that day, he was part of a pinnacle moment for human development and evolution. Many ballyhoo the space program as a waist of time, money, and human effort. I don't, but that is not my point today.

For thousands of years, humans continually perfected tools and technologies that led to Aldrin and Neil Armstrong's walk on the moon. The "small step" was a pinnacle moment for human achievement. I am personally proud of that moment because it was not created out of war or conquering a nation. It was exploration.

View of our little marble from the lunar orbiter

One powerful moment Aldrin shared was when he saw earth while standing on the moon. All humanity except Armstrong, Michael Collins in the lunar orbiter, and himself were on that one blue ball. Every person they knew or didn't know could be seen in one single blink. That is a type of solitude and whole world view that would be overwhelmingly beautiful to me and would be a true pinnacle moment in self-actualizing your place in the big picture.

In the interview Aldrin talked about his new book, Magnificent Desolation: The Long Journey Home from the Moon, chronicling the difficulties faced after returning from the moon. He left NASA not long after the lunar mission to return to the Air Force where he found few opportunities. He retired from the USAF and suddenly found himself drifting with out a plan.

As you can imagine, Aldrin's whole military and astronaut career had been very structured with large goals and projects to focus efforts on. Now he was retired and undirected and he developed an addiction to alcohol.

This is the part of the story that really interested me on a personal level. As the interviewer mentioned, Aldrin could not simply go to a career counselor and get help. "Well, the normal career path for people who are the first on the moon is ...' I mean there's no way to complete that sentence. You were in an unusual situation to say the least." This man lived the first-hand history of one of humanity's pinnacle moments. How do you figure out what is your next step (that is one big step).


Aldrin became a project manager and planner for future NASA missions. He is currently working on planning future missions to the moon and Mars. His excitement for these projects are inspirational to me. They inspire me with their lofty goals of exploration, but more importantly they inspire me because I appreciate seeing some one living and doing what is deeply and passionately part of their soul.

Tonight I am going to raise a glass of wine and toast those three men who forty years ago today saw all of humanity in one simple large-scale view and then had to return to it. I don't know if I would have made that trip home.

Those Simple Little Things

What are those simple little things someone does to arouse you?

A couple of days ago I was riding the bus home from work. Across the isle on the sunny side was a beautiful woman with long, loosely curled auburn hair. She was magnificently back lit as she gazed out the window. At one point she became lost in her thoughts, reached up and unconsciously started to slowly twirl an end of her long hair. Her fingers slowly intertwined, feeling the texture, rolling the hair between the pads of her finger and thumb in slow sensual circles. For that moment I could feel her hair between my fingers.

That is an example of one of those simple little things. She had no intention of how that moment would be become a little thing for me. Sometimes the little things are purposefully done (a wink, an extended gaze, showing a little extra thigh, etc.) and other times they are just part of a person's mannerisms.

In the erotic book, The Fermata by Nicholson Baker, one of the female characters finds it incredibly sexy to watch a man take off his watch and rub his wrist where it had been. The main male character uses this knowledge of her small fetish to start her seduction in a very unusual way.

There are many of those little things that work for me and many more yet to be discovered. I didn't know that the simple act of twirling her hair in her fingers would be one of them.

So, what are some of those simple little things that make you want?

Favorite Repetitive Firsts

Coffee Drinker
Olive Ray

A week ago I got a haircut. Mel, who has cut my hair for eleven years (one of my longest relationships with any person), was tying the straps of the cape over my neck when she asked, "Would you like a Corona with lime?"

I looked at the clock on the wall, 3:30pm. It was eighty-five degrees outside and for some reason I said, "yes." I don't drink beer much and am not a big Corona fan. Something made me want that beer.

Mel returned with bottle of Corona and a lime wedge inserted in the top. I grabbed the bottle and felt the cold wet condensation chill my hand. My anticipation grew. I pinched the lime wedge between my fingers, releasing its juice down the inside of the bottle neck, then pushed it inside the bottle.

I looked at the bottle for a second then touched it to my lips. The cold beer flowed into my mouth and I savored the flavor, then swallowed before it could warm. At that moment, the world came to a peaceful quietness and the coolness of the beer traveled down my throat and through my body. I relaxed back in the seat, feeling ready for my haircut and the rest of the day.

I mentioned how perfect the first sip of cold beer on a warm afternoon is to Mel. We started thinking of other repetitive firsts that never lose their charm, power, and pleasure. These things had to be experiences we repeat multiple times in our lives, yet we still relish the first moments of them.

Here are a few we thought of and a few more I want to add.

• The first puff off of a cigar or cigarette. The rich smoke spreading through my being. Mel loves her cigarettes and I love my occasional cigar.
• The first sip of good coffee in the morning. This is one of my all time favorite rituals. I feel the warm rich flavor flow to every molecule of my body.
• The first taste of my mom's German potato salad. Every time I enjoy that initial burst of flavor, a epicurean ecstasy fills me.
• The first time I see Half Dome and El Capitan when I enter Yosemite National Park. I enjoy seeing them every other day of my stay, but that first view of natural beauty is as close to a religious moment that I've ever experienced. (This also happens in Glacier National Park and Death Valley)
• The first kiss leading to sex. It may be the 5003rd time we made love, but that first kiss sets the mood, tone, atmosphere, and expectations for the next few hours.
• The first time I hear Silent Night and Oh Holy Night during the appropriate Christmas season. Both put me in a peaceful, powerful moment that makes me have hope. Each time after that, they lose meaning due to them being over played.
• The first time I cycle the transmission through all the gears after not driving a stick shift for a while.
• The feeling of me sliding into my lover's wet warmth as I slowly push and she pulls me in. This short moment of pure beauty combines the senses of taste (a kiss) smell ( arousal ) sound (a moan, sigh and breathing) sight (seeing me enter and the beauty of her body, eyes and her taking me in) and of course touch (the richest touch experience for me, the warm, deep embrace of becoming one with her) This one I didn't bring up with Mel... would have been awkward.
• The first photo I take of a new subject. The exhilaration of starting out a new photographic adventure.
• The first dinner out on a trip. It sets the mood for the rest of the eating adventures ahead.

These are some of my favorite repeated firsts. Do you have any?