Portland, Oregon

Moments

This morning I listened to the duet "Portland, Oregon" from Loretta Lynn's Van Lear Rose album featuring Jack White on guitar and vocals.  This song makes me smile for many reasons,- the location, themes, Jack's guitar and voice talent mixing with Loretta's, and what I know of both performers.

Location 
I've been to Portland many times.  It is a clean, progressive city in the northwest tip of Oregon.  It  is flanked by Mount Hood to the east.  The Columbia River forms the city's northern boundary.   Most  days seem to be overcast and gray, but the rare sunny days are true beautiful gifts.

In the mid 2000's, Portland boasted having more strip clubs per-capita than any other US city.  Most of these strip clubs are small "ma and pa" establishments.  The performers tend to move away from the typical strip routines and perform more burlesque or performance art pieces that have strong erotic content set to individual sound tracks.  In other words, they aren't just stripping off pink thongs to a Bon Jovi song.

Portland quiets down after midnight.  It becomes a quiet city under rainy skies.  I've spent a few nights there in a hotel's bar.  The bar in the video is not much different than the ones I patronized.  They are kind of empty and full of solitary people who want something more for the night. 

Well Portland Oregon and sloe gin fizz
If that ain't love then tell me what is
 Well I lost my heart it didn't take no time
But that ain't all. I lost my mind in Oregon

Themes
I imagine this song is about two people visiting the city separately, but finding each other over drinks.  For reasons that may be both right and wrong, they extend their night together until the next day.  They are reflecting back on it with a smile.  They know it was one night "party" with each other and may feel a small bit of regret, but mostly a fond one-time memory.

In a booth in the corner with the lights down low
I was movin' in fast she was takin' it slow
Well I looked at him and caught him lookin' at me
I knew right then we were playin' free in Oregon

Performers
In my opinion there are two types of female voices in classic country music.  The first is the angelic pure voice that melts your heart with its beauty.  Patsy Cline had this type of voice and style.   Listen to her sing "Crazy" to hear the purity of tone and the beauty she shared.

 

The second type is the sultry and worn voice.  Where the first type melts your heart, the second either stokes your heart's arousal or breaks it from the sadness of the singer's story.  These voices may have been tempered by smoking, whiskey, and over expression to create that mix of eros, pathos, despair, dark night clubs, and broken marriages, Loretta Lynn has the second type of voice.

Loretta Lynn is a country music legend.  Her autobiography, Coal Miner's Daughter,  was made into a Oscar winning movie.  Lynn's library of country music has too many themes and styles to list here.  Combined, they show how she has lived a full life and sang about it.  The memories may be good, bad, old, or new.

Jack White was the singer and guitarist for the Detroit neo-punk blues band The White Stripes.  White's music is known for his hard, bluesy guitar playing and solos that are both technically and musically amazing.  His lyrics tend to be dark and reminiscent of childhood, relationships, and his perceptions of them.  I saw The White Stripes in 2005 and it was the best concert I've attended.

Portland, Oregon starts with White's high-pitched, fast, pizzicato guitar lick that sounds like a humming bird's heart.  It is a mix of blues, country, and flamenco guitar styles that provides the feeling of growing interest, excitement, and buzz of the night, yet slightly deadened by the alcohol fueling the moment.  After White's solo, the tempo slows down and he slowly strums a repeated string of notes as other instruments join in.  They speed the tempo up again and grow in volume right before the singing starts.

When you combine both of them, their duet takes on a new life.  You can hear Jack's young male voice (he is 35 years old) mix with Loretta's sultry experienced female voice (she is 75).  To me, they show his young, brash yet shy, eagerness and her wizened yet quiet desire to make the night one to remember.  They both sing and perform very well to their respective roles in the song. 

White and Lynn then take turns singing individually and ending the song together as they sing the songs final lines: 

Well sloe gin fizz works might fast
When you drink it by the pitcher and not by the glass
Hey bartender before you close
Pour us one more drink and a pitcher to go

And a pitcher to go [repeat]

This is not an important song in the annals of music.  It doesn't tell an important story or share deep parts of the human psyche.  It is a short story of a short moment in two people's lives.  It does not idealize or romanticize the night, it tells the story and alludes to the role of alcohol, location, and opportunity in making the night go its path.


Portland, Oregon
Loretta Lynn and Jack White


Well Portland Oregon and sloe gin fizz
If that ain't love then tell me what is
Well I lost my heart it didn't take no time
But that ain't all. I lost my mind in Oregon


In a booth in the corner with the lights down low
I was movin' in fast she was takin' it slow
Well I looked at him and caught him lookin' at me
I knew right then we were playin' free in Oregon


Next day we knew last night got drunk
But we loved enough for the both of us
In the morning when the night had sobered up
It was much too late for the both of us in Oregon


Well sloe gin fizz works might fast
When you drink it by the pitcher and not by the glass
Hey bartender before you close
Pour us one more drink and a pitcher to go


And a pitcher to go [repeat]

What did you decide?

All Your Dreams - NYC

Life is the sum of all your choices.  ~Albert Camus

But adults need to be allowed to be adults. ~ Z

Outie - NYC

More NYC images.

The Male Gaze

First -  A Glance 

Second - The Gaze

You have to be sly to check out a woman without her noticing or feeling awkward.  To do it right you must first look at her feet then slowly look up her body, not stopping on any body part, leading to her eyes.  Always finish with her eyes.  If you look at her eyes first then look down to check the rest of her,  she will know what you are doing.  Old advice originally written in the 1950's I recently heard quoted on a radio news segment.

Much has been written about the male gaze.  To gaze at something is to view it, absorb it and give it some personal meaning.  The male gaze is described as the popular media focus of providing images that are primarily for the heterosexual male with heterosexual females being a secondary audience. 

For both audiences, we are being manipulated into believing this slick propaganda is the only way to happiness.  The only way to get the girl is to do what the ad, movie, tv show is telling us to.   In an even more manipulative and devious method, the messages tell women they are not worth anything to men unless they meet these expectations.

I am not sure how prevalent the male gaze is in our media today compared to generations past.  I've seen great spoofs of it where the tables are turned.  This famous Diet Coke ad below is one example of the role reversal.   Even with it, is the satire directed at mocking the male gaze or is it mocking women for their version of it?



I believe the male dominated media industry's male gaze machine hurts humanity by limiting us on what we should find desirable with narrow definitions of beauty, sexuality, and objectification of women.  As a culture and a population, it is bad.  One challenge for me though is to determine if that same sense of "wrongness" should apply to the individual.

Unseen Interactions

I am a mostly heterosexual guy.  I overall know what my preferences are in determining attractiveness.  My preferences are not limited to certain ages, races, body shapes, hair colors, or geographic backgrounds.  I've been attracted to them all.  For me, it is the attitude, beliefs, self perceptions, intelligence and physical appearance combining to make a woman so damn attractive and sexy.  Sometimes I see an instant attraction that disappears as soon as a conversation starts.  Other times I feel a great and deeper attraction grow from getting to know the person and learning about how attractive they are.  On the special occasion, the instant and the ongoing attraction coincide.

Even though I believe I am a somewhat enlightened guy, I have my preferences that influence my male gaze.  It is part of my DNA, my soul, and who I am that directs me to look at what attracts me.  It is not as primal as a moth flying to the light, but it is an almost unconscious, autonomic physical behavior to look.  I will look.

"The day I stop looking is the day they close the lid."  Frank, an octogenarian and former coworker. 

Over the years I've chosen to acknowledge and learn about the male gaze in modern media and pop culture and how it is damaging society.  I believe everyone should recognize, develop, appreciate, and maintain a healthy (insert your name here) gaze.  I am sure all people who are sexual have their version of the gaze.  The Karl Gaze likes how the curve of the back of the leg is mirrored and accentuated by the curve of the breasts leading up to the neck and the chin.  That is one part of my gaze, but not the only part of it.  My gaze also likes how the sunlight shines through the silhouetted hair and caresses around the beautiful edge of skin on the nose, lips, chin, and neck of a woman standing by a window on a sunny day.  My gaze also appreciates the slow walk of a woman deep in thought about something as her mind focuses and her walking becomes secondary.  These and many other appreciated parts of my gaze make up a unique fingerprint of who I am and what I find attractive.  My gaze/fingerprint should not be the same as any others'.

Piernas (Andrea on the hood of my old truck)

With all aspects of our individuality, we must recognize and respect others when we use it.  Our gaze must not be the only discriminating filter when judging others.  Our gaze should not demean others because they are not part of our preferences in beauty.

My gaze is reflected in my photography.   It is not limited to the women in my photos, but to everything I capture.  My gaze is part of the theme, soul, aesthetic, and core of my photography.  It is not the only part of it, though I would be stupid to try to hide it and not acknowledge its importance.  I am no longer going to feel obligated to apologize for my art.  It is how I see things and art should be for the artist.  Viewers of it are free to make their own interpretations, projections and decide if they like my art or not.  I am interested in their views, but I will not apologize for what I've created.

"Europeans enjoy taking a moment to look at each other and appreciating each others' appearance.  Americans feel awkward and self conscious about this."  Something I recently overheard, but can not remember where and from whom.

Maybe it is time to accept, as individuals, that our gaze, what we find attractive and the preferences we hold are not bad to have.  How we use them may not be good, but having them is part of being human.  I refuse to limit myself to avoiding looking at beauty, in all forms, and enjoying it in a respectful manner.  That goes for what I look at and what I photograph as well.


Great continuation of the thread over at What We Saw Today.

Moon - 071310

Valya - 071310

Travel, Travails, Trevi and The Sweet Life

Original Movie Poster

If you did not read a post of mine from a few weeks ago, you missed the reason I am in Rome. On top of getting to enjoy the great sights, eating wonderful food and seeing beauty in both art and human form, I have to work. Today was the first day of a conference on global compliance laws for pharmaceuticals. It was about as dull as dust. To be honest, I don't know why they had to fly all of us to Rome for something we could have met in New Jersey for. That would have saved money and the environment a bit of wear and tear since most of us came from San Francisco or the greater New York area.

Toward the end of the seventh hour, I looked longingly outside and saw the rain had stopped. We got out an hour later. I ran up to my room, grabbed my camera, guide book scarf, coat, and map and headed out. I wanted to see the Trevi Fountain again. My visual taste of it yesterday was not enough.

Fontana di Trevi

According to my guide book, Rome Encounter by the Lonely Planet, they say of the Trevi Fountain:

Rococo extravaganza Trevi Foutain (Fontana di Trevi) was immortalized by Anita Ekberg's midnight dip in La Vita Dolce. Designed by Nicola Salvi in 1732, it depicts Neptune's chariot being led by Tritons with sea horses - one wild, one docile - representing the various moods of the sea.

Docile

I think the various moods of the sea horses symbolize the conflict in all humans. We are broken docile animals that society makes of us as we shuffle about our daily chores of pulling others' chariots, but many of us still have wild desires, needs, anger, and passions that tear at us to live again.

Wild

According to local lore, if a visitor tosses a one coin into the fountain, they will return to Rome. Tossing in two coins will bring a new romance. Tossing in three coins will bring a marriage or a divorce. I wonder what I have in my pocket.

As you can tell by the scale of the fountain, it isn't subtle. It is bold, in your face, maybe even gaudy and goddamn I love it. I love it when art can be big, balls out and unavoidable. Screw being subtle for all art. Sometimes you just have to make a spectacle that draws a blond beauty to go splashing about in its waters as it did in La Vita Dolce.

Below is the famous scene from La Vita Dolce. It is a stunning piece. Both actors are beautiful and give a brief taste of a time that died away before I was born. Now that I just watched this scene again, it is interesting how she baptizes him just moments before they almost kiss. How transgressive is that? She is taking the role of a priest (baptism) to cleanse him before that sensual (and to some, sinful) moment.



Sadly, my Rome Roamin' is slowing down to tiny half hour excursions until this conference ends.

Yes, I am Feeling It

"Self Titled"
Photo by SB

"Desire" is a mighty word. We all desire things. We desire sexy things, noble things, dirty things, materialistic things, healthy things, religious/spiritual things, peaceful things, violent things, dangerous things, safe things... you get the point. We all desire the experience to experience the desire.

Desires are like drugs. They are not good or bad. It is how we use them that can be interpreted as good or bad. At this moment I desire spam and eggs (guilty pleasure), coffee, and toast. This is an OK desire, in moderation. Last week I desired a big cigar, a not-so-good desire. I always pay for it physically after smoking one, by tasting it in my mouth and throat for days, but sometimes it is worth it.

Last night I desired sex. Today I desire it. Tomorrow I will desire it. They are not the same desires. That is such a bland statement to say, "I desire sex." That is like saying, "I desire food." Both have such variety that the statement has no meaning.

Last night I desired food, a big salad with grilled asparagus, thinly sliced grilled chicken, and grated manchego cheese with a balsamic/olive oil dressing, crusty bread and wine to accompany it. That is pretty specific.

As I age, I am starting to appreciate my desires more by trying to refine them to their essence. This is helping me find what I truly enjoy in the experience. I am trying to do this with my eating, activities, what I photograph, who I visit, where I travel, and what I do.

So, last night I desired sex. That is too vague. I desired sex passionate rough sex on the futon in my home office. Next time it could be soft sex lasting for hours on a soft feather bed. When I compare my sexual desires now to those of my teen years, they are focused. When I was fifteen, I desired sex... any I could get. I didn't have the discriminating palette that comes with experience and knowledge. I didn't know what I didn't know.

Now I am a bit more discriminating about most of my tastes. I am trying to fine tune my experiences to relish the elegant simple beauty of the need. I am finding great pleasures in that.

I need to be careful desiring and focusing in on such discreet pleasures. I may miss great opportunities for new discoveries and pleasures. It is the cliche of "missing the forest for the trees" issue.

A few years ago I was practically living in my darkroom developing film and making prints. I kept honing my skills and vision while disregarding all my friends' excitement for digital. I saw digital more as convenient than artistic. That changed when I met a landscape/flower photographer who shot digital and showed me her work. I didn't know that color and resolution had come so far as to rival film. Since I got my digital SLR last December, I've opened my artistic world in a new direction that greatly excites me. I hope I don't lose my desire to work in film though.

So, right now I desire a walk with my dogs around this foggy morning. I know I wont desire that when it is going to be 100+ early next week. Time to satisfy that desire.

Photo note - Another of the "word" photos with Candace. At first I was disappointed with the image since it was not sharp. After playing with it a little by a de-saturating, bumping contrast, and enhancing grain, I think this matches how I view "desire." Desires usually have a feel and color to them and may have a scent, taste, and feel as well. This one pretty much sums up my feelings last night.

Desire
U2

Lover, Im on the street
Gonna go where the bright lights
And the big city meet
With a red guitar...on fire
Desire

Shes a candle burning in my room
Yeah Im like the needle, needle and spoon
Over the counter with a shotgun
Pretty soon everybody got one
And the fever when Im beside her
Desire, desire...

And the fever...getting higher
Desire, desire...burning, burning

Shes the dollars
Shes my protection
Yeah shes a promise
In the year of election
Oh sister, I cant let you go
Like a preacher stealing hearts
At a traveling show
For love or money money money
Money money money money money
Money money money
And the fever, getting higher
Desire, desire, desire, desire
Desire, desire

.