Cul de sacs

Hana and Leila - 111610

The term cul de sac is French for "bottom of the bag."  That sounds about right.  I went for a walk this weekend in a new neighborhood full of them.  It kind of felt like living at the bottom of the bag, the end of a road.

I've been taking stock of my life a bit over the last few weeks.  One thing I've done is started identifying my personal cul de sacs.  These dead ends are things in my life I don't need to go down any further.  Some of them are hopes from my youth, desires that are no longer relevant, artistic pursuits and interests. 

DISCLAIMER - I support the LGBT community and want everyone to celebrate their sexuality.  I hope everyone has a rich, rewarding sex life. What I am about to say is not my judgment of these groups or their erotic love.  It is about my preferences.

When I look back at my images with Leila and Hana, I am now getting a feeling this is a cul de sac. 

I took those photos in 2004 and loved looking at them.  I appreciated the beauty, the lines, the moment from each image.  Hana and Leila shared the gift of their caring, passionate intimacy with me.  I was  aroused making them and working on them afterward.

Leila and Hana - 111610B

Since 2008, I've had other feelings about sapphic imagery.  These changes are due to many reasons.  One of the biggest is that I am finding them less and less arousing for my own personal desires.  Now when I see these photos, I see the deep attraction Leila and Hana felt for each other and shared off camera as well.

I wrote more about my evolving views on sapphic erotic imagery here (The appeal of sapphos and threesomes), where I go into much greater detail.  I fully support others taking these photos, but I think I am done.  I have reached the end of that cul de sac and it is time to find other things to photograph.

Photo note - I've used a black and white variation of this photo before.  I think the BW version is better, but I like the accent of Hana's red panties.  It adds a little pop to this image.  I would work with either of these models again... just not together.   The lightning struck once, and that was enough.  More photos of Hana and Leila.

"Sex. In America an obsession. In other parts of the world a fact"

"Sex. In America an obsession. In other parts of the world a fact."

-- Marlene Dietrich

I am breaking one of my new rules for this blog.  I am straying away from art and photography and am going to write about freedom of speech and sexual health.  All of this came from hearing a story on first amendment issues on NPR and then reading a photo/video essay at Slate.com on the differences between the United States and Europe concerning teen condom education and advertisements.

PART 1

Video Game Ad at Ground Zero, NYC - 2010

Here is the story.   The Supreme Court is considering a California law that bans the sale of violent video games to those under 18.  The proponents use the argument that these games are dangerous and should follow the same restrictions as pornography.  The opponents (primarily video game makers) claim this is an infringement of free speech.  Many cite the court's decision earlier this year allowing the sale of crushing videos (where animals are tortured, fought, or crushed to death) as potential precedence.

What the fuck is wrong with this country?  In that last paragraph we basically equated pornography may equal violent video games but is more offensive and damaging than animal snuff films?  I understand two of the issues deal with selling adult content to minors and the third concerns free speech of creating a type of speech that is controversial (and unforgivable in my mind).  If the supreme court decides that violent video games can be sold to minors then they are giving the indirect message of sex is worse than virtual graphic killing and/or the sale of products depicting the ultimate animal cruelty.

I support the bans on selling pornography AND violent video games to minors.  Both bans are easy to get around with the internet and permissive/absent parenting, but at least there is some legal protection.  While the pornography laws have become draconian and suppresses free speech through the evolution of 2257, the original intent has validity.

Once again America has stated, violence is good, sex is bad.


PART 2

Please read and watch the essay on safe sex/condom promotions aimed toward European and American teens.  It is an eye opener.  Here is the link.

I find the European ads (especially the Netherlands) very interesting, humorous, effective, and refreshing in how they accept teen sexuality.  While not promoting it, they want to educate the teen lovers  of what to do when the moment arises.  The two most interesting bits are on slides 12 and 15.  On slide 12 they interview Dutch and American teens about the perception of carrying condoms for both young men and women.  On slide 15, you can see a video I watch regularly to inspire me to use condoms.  I know not all kids are like that and I know that boy needs love too, but I remember being that brat and never want to be responsible for that brat either.

Ok, back to regular programming. In my next post I will write about something photographic or artistic.  Ciao.


More of my writing on these issues.


Stuff about 2257. 

Porn and Drugs, part 2- last one, I promise... for now.

The greatest challenge of addressing the topic of pornography is the lack of definition. After an email exchange with Dr. L about life, art, and our recent pornography posts, I found another instance where drugs and porn are similar and may help with the difficulty of defining the term. It all comes down to our reaction to the subject. Some of us process the subject one way while others go in different directions.

In our emails and blogs, we discussed the definition, or lack of definition, of "pornography." The good Dr. made a great point in her email,

"It is meaningless to me. If no one knows what something means, then it doesn't exist."

How can something exist that can not be defined?

Think about a word of something physical like "pencil." According to Wikipedia,

A pencil is a writing implement or art medium usually constructed of a narrow, solid pigment core inside a protective casing. The case prevents the core from breaking, and also from marking the user’s hand during use. Pencils create marks via physical abrasion, leaving behind a trail of solid core material that adheres to a sheet of paper or other surface. They are noticeably distinct from pens, which dispense liquid or gel ink that stain the light color of the paper.

That pretty much sums up a pencil. How about something more challenging like "love". According to Wikipedia,

Love is any of a number of emotions related to a sense of strong affection and attachment. 

Love then can be defined from different cultural views, physiological reasons.  It was broken down into different types of love by the Greeks. These types were:

• agape - divine, unconditional love, eros - passionate, sensual, longing
• philia - a practical love with loyalty to the family, community, and those around you
• storge - natural affection and caring, like parent to child
• xenia - love through hospitality.

Even though "love" is much more abstract than "pencil", it still has a definition that most can understand and agree on. Pornography doesn't have that going for it.

Drugs and Metabolism - a connection to porn

I am amazed how our body works with things to either hurt or help us. Our body stores fat in the belly to keep organs warm and maintain a fuel supply near them when food is scarce. It also causes health issues when we store too much fat there.

The body metabolizes things differently and can change things ingested or breathed in into completely different things. We breathe in oxygen and exhale carbon dioxide. Our body changed it.

In a more complex example, our body ingests a drug and changes it into a different compound. Capecitabine is a colorectal and breast cancer treatment taken orally via a tablet. When some patients take capecitabine, it is changed in the body to a substance called 5-fluorouracil (5-FU). For some patients, 5-FU stops cancer cells from growing and decreases tumor size.

This is amazing.  The drug is taken and the body decides how to digest it and interpret it into something different. Not all patients have the same response. This means it is up to the individual patient's body to decide what happens when the product is taken.

"I can't define obscenity, but I know it when I see it."

This is where I see the relationship of drugs and metabolism to pornography. Pornography is defined by the individual in how his or her mind digests it. Depending on her/his beliefs, experiences, desires, likes/dislikes, exposure, education, and many other factors, the viewer interprets and defines the material differently. With the definition being unique to each individual, it is impossible to create a communal definition of pornography. 

End note - I want to leave this poor beaten dead horse alone.  Being related to a pheonix though, the porno horse will rise again and I am sure I will write about it then.

Porn and Drugs

Classic Modern Leila

Dr. L over at What We Saw Today wrote about pornography again.  She discusses how the vague boundaries of porn makes it so hard to discuss and define.  All of this makes me think porn and drugs are related, but not in the way you may think.

I've written about pornography a bit too.  I've stated that I believe porn can be art, but not all porn is art.  I've made what most would consider porn.  I've viewed porn.  I am not going to define the boundaries between art, porn and erotica since all three can blend a bit for me.  While the content of the pornography varies and can be defended or blamed, I am not writing about content now.  I want to focus on porn usage.  My belief about porn usage is similar to that of drugs.  Neither are good or bad, it is the intention of the use that is "good" or "bad."

Along the way to getting my psychology degree I had to take both Use and Abuse of Drugs and Human Sexuality.  Both were great classes.  Both came with warnings and caveats.  Both courses were held in the largest auditorium on campus, seating 499 people.  Both classes were full. 

Follow the Arc

In the sex class, we were told on the first day that we could not bring friends, family or any other guest to the class unless they were registered.  The professors (one a behavioral biologist covering the physiology of sex, the other a social anthropologist, covering the cultural, historic, and other contextual aspects of sexuality) told us that we would become used to talking about sex openly and seeing explicit imagery in the class.  If we brought anybody from the outside, they would not  be "desensitized" to the this content and may become distressed.  What a titillating hook!  That made me want to attend class even more.  It was a great class where I learned more about human sexuality than the rest of life could teach me.  We always joked that the lectures were good, but the labs were the best!

The drugs course was a tough class.  We had to learn about the different classifications, uses, and outcomes of using drugs.  Twenty-one years later, I think I've forgotten most of that stuff, which is funny since I work for a drug company.  The main lesson I learned was something the professor stated on the first overhead transparency (pre-Power Point days).

Drugs are neither good or bad, it is how we use them that are good or bad.

The Blessed Ludivica Albertoni 1 - Classic Porn?

All pharmaceutical companies have to monitor the safety of their products.  Every drug has side effects and issues.  By tracking each adverse event and determining the risk/benefit of the product in a process called pharmacovigilance, we strive to give the patients and their health care providers the best information to make needed decisions.

Risk/benefit is a very gray area.    Here is a fictional, but common scenario, I have cancer that will kill me in 5 months.  If I take drug X, it has shown to increase survival rates by up to three years.  The major side effects are nausea and joint pain.  There is a toxicity issue that if taken more than five years, the drug will cause serious and permanent kidney and liver damage that is probably fatal.  Those are pretty bad risks, but the probability that I would live past five years is almost nil making the kidney and liver damage issue moot.  As for the nausea and joint pain, I have to decide if the quality of life issues caused by those side effects are worth it to live another few years.   The risk/benefit equation tips toward benefit.

The Blessed Ludivica Albertoni 2 - Detail

Now lets take the same scenario, but make the disease psoriasis.  Psoriasis is a severe disease, but not fatal.  The risk/benefit equation tips toward risk and the drug should not be given.

If we look at risk/benefit for illegal drugs or drugs that can be used for illegal purposes, it gets complicated.  Marijuana has both risks and benefits.  For cancer and AIDS patients, it can help them survive and lessen the symptoms.  For the pot smokers just wanting a great afternoon of watching Threes Company and toking a bowl, the equation is different.  When we look at E, ruffies, heroin, cocaine, crack, vicodin, huffing glue, meth, the risk/benefit equation heavily tilts toward risk.


Good/Bad, Risk/Benefit as related to porn usage.

In Dr. L's post, she mentions that serial killer Ted Bundy blamed porn as the cause of his crimes.  Whether his statement is true and how true it is, his usage suggests a bad use for porn.  I doubt that porn made him do it, but I can't rule out that it had an influence.  With his case, my assessment is bad use, heavy risk.

Many men in committed relationships view porn.  For some it is just a quick tension release and doesn't affect relations with their partners and family.  It is similar to enjoying a beer after a day's work and relaxing.  In that case I would assess it as good use, good benefits.

Stirred 2 (still baffled why you would need wifi at a brothel)

Many men in committed relationships view porn for hours, masturbating with it daily or even more frequently.  They would rather do that than have sex with their significant others.  There could be many reasons they are not seeking their partner (partner is not interested or is unable to have sex, emotional issues, etc.).  If this use of porn is leading to problems and addictions, I assess it as bad use, risky.

Those are enough scenarios, you can look at how it can help couples explore and have more fun or how it leads people into riskier activities in search of the next hot stimulating thing.  All of them are on that good/bad, risk/benefit scale.

So, which is it for you?  Do you abstain from using it?  Are you a recovering addict?  Are you a recreational user?  Do you use it to improve a healthy sex life?


Side not that is barely related to the topic.
My city of 135K+ souls has only two bookstores, both "adult" and neither really have any books in them.  We have Pier One Imports, Best Buy, Home Depot, Petco, Costco, Target, Walmart, Olive Garden, and sales lots for every major car manufacturer, except Ford.  Makes me wonder what our community really thinks is important to consume.  Literature is not on the list.